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Conversation Schedule

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DAY 1: Monday, September 6th

Leave Your History and Triggers Behind

Alain Dumonceaux

Alain Dumonceaux

Men who work with me have meaning again in their lives. By guiding them to make better choices they learn to heal past wounds, repair and stop hidden patterns that are sabotaging their lives allowing them to live their destiny with clarity and conviction in all aspects of their life.

Our Conversation Highlights

  • What does it take for a man to become awakened if he does not even know he is not.
  • Take responsibility for 3 things
  • Living other people’s version of me.
  • Hero’s Journey.
  • I was completely disconnected from my marriage.
  • I was not in it as a couple.
  • Codependent. She lived for me; she lost who she was.
  • I did not put enough in.
  • Once the children came, I felt neglected.
  • Resentment.
  • Father quiet, mother strong-willed, I saw my father as weak.
  • I wouldn’t make a fuss. 
  • I didn’t know how to have a conversation about the stuff that was bothering me.
  • What is truly bothering us?
  • Authenticity.
  • Built connection.
  • Schedule time for each other.
  • No commitment means no trust.
  • What if you are “Married to an asshole?”

Tony Jeton Selimi

Tony J Selimi

Tony J. Selimi is an internationally sought keynote speaker, filmmaker, transformational coach and cognition expert specialising in helping business owners from all market sectors and individuals from all professions turn their challenges into stepping stones, unleash, accelerate and maximise their human potential so they can achieve quantum leaps in all of the critical areas of life. His vast heart calling and life mission is to inspire affirmative action in the lives of one billion people.

Our Conversation Highlights

  • Spiritual; mental and emotional breakthroughs.
  • Business; finance. relationships & wealth-building. I help them truly awaken themselves to their biggest potential.
  • Born in northern Macedonia (Yugoslavia, a communist country).
  • All of us experienced abuse, discrimination; not being equal to someone else.
  • Healthy family but unhealthy environment. Education and work ethic – learnt how to face challenges.
  • Curiosity about spirituality, science & life’s greatest challenges after life-threatening illness when young.
  • I had to be a soldier. My mother sent me to London to save my life. I rather wanted to give my life to save my mother.
  • I was homeless and cried for 6 weeks. Will I ever see my family again?
  • Shame followed me like a ghost.
  • Come to terms with myself.
  • Build your authentic self; grow your soul.
  • Take back control, own your power, live authentically, live freely on your terms.
  • Self mastery, #loneliness, Point of light & hope

Alan Cox

Alan Cox

Imagine life without your family and friends. Marriages fail, friendships lost, stroke survivors and their carers struggle because of communication breakdown. We are changing this. Brainy Gecko’s Mindful Communication Course collaborates with stroke survivors, carers, and psychologists, delivering practical communication skills that deepen relationships.

Our Conversation Highlights

  • “You will never see me cry again.”
  • Life happens.
  • 40s’ hiccup midlife crisis.
  • 24 hours to talk about a pinch.
  • You can’t solve your problems by distracting yourself. 
  • When you lock your emotions away, you are powerless. 
  • Listening skills.
  • Accept that you are an emotional being.
  • The person that you are with, your partner and children, are emotional beings.
  • How to express your feelings in a way that doesn’t point the finger.
  • Renegotiate expectations. 
  • What being driven causes.
  • People are good defenders not listeners.
  • 7 clues people give when they are about to leave

Tim Horn

Tim Horn

All my clients want to achieve greater happiness in their lives. When they realize they are the most important person in their own lives, they begin to achieve goals they had only dreamt of. Releasing weight, stress or addictions starts with a person’s acceptance of self.

Our Conversation Highlights

  • “Your neighborhood mind mechanic”
  • When did your wife know that she could marry you?
  • The way the mind works is important.
  • Don’t shut off a child’s ability to learn.
  • Parents create a context for a feeling within a child.
  • Everything that happens affects you positively or negatively.
  • Pleasing our parents.
  • Abandonment fears.
  • Self-judgement can make you jail yourself.
  • Create a new normal.
  • Self-abandonment.
  • People audition to be in a relationship with you.
  • Natural resilience.
  • When you work things out you, are able to let it go.
  • How much do you value the other person?
  • Accept our own and the other person’s frailties.
  • Fear of being wrong.

DAY 2: Tuesday, September 7th

Mindful Awareness in Relationships

Chuck Groot

Chuck Groot

Chuck Groot’s CPA, MPA, MBA credentials as an author, coach and entrepreneur are noteworthy. His clients credit their success to his uncanny ability to get right to the root of any challenge that they put in front of him. He credits his success to his clients and their willingness to being open to new ideas and desire in pursuit of excellence.

Our Conversation Highlights

  • Married to an alcoholic.
  • Dissociate disease from a person.
  • We model ourselves on our fathers 
  • Drop stereotypes. Mother and charge of house, father in business.
  • The values a man needs for a successful relationship and a successful life 
  • We need to be in control of our own mind and beliefs.
  • Examine your own roles.
  • Two people going the same direction, at the same time.
  • Willingness to have meaningful conversations. 
  • How many people actually respect themselves?
  • Everyone wants to be liked and to be loved.
  • Know that you are a worthy individual; worthy of love; equal to what you are willing to give.

Mahesh Grossman

Mahesh Grossman

Mahesh Grossman is a Somatic Hypnotherapist and author of The One Minute Anxiety Solution. He’s the creator of the Defy Trauma course, featuring a 5-Step Trauma Detox Process, which allows us to return to the self-love, sense of safety, self-esteem and ability to connect with others we were born with.

Our Conversation Highlights

  • My father tried to kill me when I was 30 days old
  • My mother believed that ‘fathers leave because of a child’.
  • I was molested by my grandfather and father.
  • How not to be pissed off in your relationship. 
  • Feel in your body something you have not released.
  • Internalized patterns.
  • Unconditional love.
  • RefIll yourself with joy and inner peace.
  • We suppress our best natural qualities.
  • We believe it is not safe.
  • Anger .
  • Withdraw.
  • Control as a way of self protection.

Justin Black

Justin Black

Justin Black is a serial entrepreneur, bestselling author, and keynote speaker. He co-authored Redefining Normal: How Two Foster Kids Beat The Odds and Discovered Healing, Happiness and Love. The Redefining Normal company hosts workshops, presentations, keynote speeches, and continuing the conversation surrounding trauma, healthy relationships, foster care, and mental health.

Our Conversation Highlights

  • Redefining Normal: How Two Foster Kids Beat The Odds and Discovered Healing, Happiness and Love.
  • A family with so many mental health issues.
  • Relationships teaches us so much about what we don’t know we need to learn.
  • Working together.
  • The Redefining Normal company hosts workshops, presentations, keynote speeches, and continuing the conversation surrounding trauma, healthy relationships, foster care, and mental health.

Jeff Stitely

Jeff Stitely

I’ve supported 100s of men to successfully: *Develop presence creating a new level of flow, ease and joy *Learn how to resolve conflicts easily, effectively and hold it as a window to more intimacy *Significantly improved their sex life and intimacy *Created clarity on their direction and goals resulting in more confidence, vitality and inspiration

Our Conversation Highlights

  • What if you are married to someone who cannot be wrong?
  • What if a partner does not want counseling?
  • Committing to breaking through our defences.
  • We were opposites in so many ways.
  • I loved listening to her talk.
  • When she died of cancer it was just me for my kids.
  • I had to balance my parenting.
  • Biggest gift to yourself is to see your partner.
  • My mum did not see me. 
  • Show appreciation.
  • What it means to be present in a relationship. 
  • Authenticity.
  • Conflict resolution.
  • Conflict is so much due to misunderstanding our filters.
  • Be curious, go for clarity.
  • Shut up and listen.
  • Slow down. Sex is not about a goal.
  • Sex is an opportunity to connect.
  • Porn.
  • LGBTQI acceptance/support.

DAY 3: Wednesday, September 8th

Feelings and Fear of Commitment

Dr Doug Miller

Doug Miller

For 35 years, Dr. Miller has helped men achieve greater authenticity and satisfaction by healing childhood wounds and deconditioning limiting cultural programming. Men are empowered through improved clarity with their emotions, desires, gifts and intuition. Their connection with themselves and others improves making them more fulfilled and fulfilling partners and parents.

Our Conversation Highlights

  • I carried circumcision trauma in my body.
  • The shame we hide.
  • Felt deep betrayal.
  • Feeling unsafe.
  • Our trauma is kept in the vagal nerve until we resolve it.
  • Fear and trauma creates a loss of trust.
  • Conditioning.
  • We are all just people protecting ourselves 
  • Parents divorced when I was 5. It was so abrupt.
  • Hiding in the closet.
  • I needed to be held.
  • Mum married an alcoholic.
  • No one ever sat with my pain.
  • Tough little boy 
  • Anger.
  • Lots of jealousy, fear and trauma.
  • Most of my relationships were on auto, on the hamster wheel.
  • I always felt a bit deprived.
  • Triggering the hell out of each other
  • Anger tells you something is wrong.
  • Blind spots.
  • Men are shamed for feeling beauty

John A. Hardy

John A Hardy

John is a Leader, Activator, Futurist, Innovator, Professional Coach and Award-Winning Director of Peak Consultancy. Impacting men to be the ‘Best Version of Themselves’ with over 40 years’ experience. Transformation is the key ingredient to the powerful and engaging conversational style. New pathways await you in your journey and conversations with John.

Our Conversation Highlights

  • Making your own way in the world, I grew up in a very angry home.
  • No one ever won, I took it into my marriage.
  • Men have to realise what they are doing wrong.
  • Blockages.
  • Men are proud. 
  • Listen and adjust.
  • Men struggle to live up to examples in the media such as strong, capable, etc.
  • Have to own up to our challenges.
  • The willingness to admit we have weaknesses, the opportunity to be really strong.
  • Let go of pride, arrogance and fix-it mentality
  • Be teachable
  • “I don’t have all the answers” 
  • Men are good at hard skills but learning soft skills is transformational 
  • Asking for help!

James Stephenson

James Stephenson

Mental health, workplace well-being and suicide first aid facilitator and trainer working in the construction industry helping men have confident conversations about mental health and suicide and knowing that asking for help is a strength not a weakness.

Our Conversation Highlights

  • Single mum and absent dad.
  • One questions your worth.
  • I have not figured out how to love me. 
  • “Man up”
  • Crushing your emotions sets you up for deeper failure, deeper hurt. You are less capable of being a successful man and capable man and husband and father.
  • It’s okay to cry.
  • When you do not have an example of how to be a good father.
  • Children absorb so much in the first years.
  • I didn’t even know how much I questioned my own capabilities.
  • Abandonment Fears
  • When you have to prove something by your job title, your salary. Conditional worth.
  • It’s like you are having all these feelings that you’re not good enough unless you can get there. 
  • Am I avoiding all the futures that I fear as opposed to living in the now 
  • How much of your mother’s burden have you taken on yourself?
  • Write it down; don’t just think it. It’s therapeutic when pen hits paper.

Yonason Goldson

Yonason Goldson

Yonason Goldson works with professionals to create a culture of ethics that builds trust, sparks initiative, and drives productivity. Trust forms the bedrock of all our relationships, and healthy relationships are the key to success in our personal and professional lives.

Our Conversation Highlights

  • Men are designed incomplete.
  • We are two individuals.
  • It is easier to learn than to unlearn.
  • My father was an intellectual. Rigid, very stereotypical. 
  • He reacted sharply. It’s a problem for me too.
  • Decision fatigue.
  • Integrity means you are home.
  • Living a contradiction.
  • Living according to standards.
  • Empathy. Trustworthiness. Humility. Inquisitiveness. Courage. Self-discipline.
  • Surround yourself with people who challenge you.
  • Real strength is an internal quality, not external
  • Men will compensate by putting on a show.
  • 12-step model.
  • Something greater than yourself.
  • Happiness comes from purpose.
  • Religion can be a cult.
  • When to be more assertive, when to be passive .
  • I had to start at the beginning. I was not even sure I believed in God.
  • The Pursuit of Happiness.

DAY 4: Thursday, September 9th

Building and Repairing

Jan Robberts

As an Intentional Leadership Coach for the last 12 years, he has discovered tools and techniques to realign positive growth, personal development, confidence building, powerful communication, and self-leadership for individuals in their personal lives, their businesses and their social circles.

Our Conversation Highlights

  • No coincidences.
  • I was a fat kid. Bullying,calling me names.
  • Outside I was happy, the class clown.
  • Inside I was damaged goods.
  • My parents had no idea. I could hide in my bedroom.
  • By 12 I got tall and bullying stopped, but I kept bullying myself.
  • Ulcer at 16!
  • “I made a decision.”
  • Red Mist
  • Martial arts.
  • Family emigrated.
  • Married at 20 but it only lasted three years.
  • I married someone who wanted to change me.
  • With low self-esteem I decided it was me.
  • Difference between arrogance and confidence.
  • “When there is no enemy within, there is no enemy.”
  • I am now aware of what I put inside my head.
  • My daughter thought it was her fault we split. Daughter bulimia.
  • Second marriage: we drifted apart.
  • Taking relationships for granted.
  • In a relationship with a powerful women, the ego can get in the way

Jude Sandvall

Jude Sandvall

I am Jude: The Divorced Dadvocate and I use cutting-edge approaches to coaching dads. I will assist you in creating a crystal clear vision for your life after divorce, uncover any hidden challenges that may be sabotaging you, and leave you renewed, re-energized, and inspired.

Our Conversation Highlights

  • There are not enough resources geared at helping men after divorce.
  • Parents separated when I was 15. 
  • Marriage at 29, three daughters. 
  • Divorce is an opportunity to become broken open. 
  • Co-parenting, codependent, caregiver, controlling. 
  • If you don’t get results, you have to alter something.
  • Mother – narcissistic behaviour, dad – distant. 
  • Break generational curse.
  • Love was conditional. 
  • Fathers abdicating responsibilities.
  • One of the mistakes you make as an adult is not to work together.
  • Co-parenting tips.
  • Not to rely on others and not to trust.

Larry McInnes

Larry McInnes

Infidelity is an emotional minefield. Transitioning to the next chapter of life can be uncertain at best. Without making any excuses for our affairs, we’ll be looking at how to intentionally build a rewarding life of happiness and abundance. (Spoiler: it’s probably easier than you think.)

Our Conversation Highlights

  • After 20 years of marriage I cheated on my wife. I lost everything.
  • I spent many nights on my friend’s sofa – with a cat.
  • I fell into a deep depression.
  • My kids disowned me.
  • I started running from that damn sofa towards the unknown.
  • What was missing in my life?
  • A general or overall level of unhappiness… but you get used to stuff like that.
  • Was this really where I wanted to be?
  • I didn’t think it was fixable.
  • I just wanted out.
  • I did not see any affair on the horizon.
  • This is what affairs do: you are living two lives and comparing two lives.
  • The affair was starting to have its difficulties too.
  • I was not happy in either place.
  • I had a responsibility to address the issues.
  • I can’t fix past but I can address the present
  • We don’t talk about what bothers us.
  • I didn’t know what I didn’t know.

Louise VN

Louise VN Liebenberg

The Female Perspective.

My Session Highlights

  • As an Unresolved Trauma Expert, Relationship Counselor and Confidence Coach, Louise shares her own life transformation through not only a traumatic childhood, but also a traumatic marriage.
  • From her perspective on where she is now, and through her experience as Group Coaching Facilitator, she shares her experience by being part of these open conversations, but also by highlighting the similarities and differences between men and women
  • She wants you to know that you can change everything that is holding you back.

Gifts from our generous experts

  • Dads Guide to Divorce
  • Access to How to Cope with Sudden Change
  • Be the Master of Your Day
  • Top ten tips to Protect yourself financially in 2021
  • Self-Care series
  • Skies Wide Open: How to Teach Your Child to Dream Big and Love Learning
  • From Infidelity to Abundance: Masterclasses for Men and Women
  • Thinking Habits Health Assessment
  • The Successful Leader’s Code of Values
  • How to Find Meaning & Balance in Your Life, Business and Relationships
  • A Path to Wisdom and #Loneliness Excerpt
  • Healthy vs Unhealthy Checklist

All gifts and resources available on the days the Summit Conversations are live.

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