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Wednesday: Rewriting The Stories We Tell Ourselves – Inner Child Healing Tools

Money Fears Self Drive Workshop [Value: $67]

Healthy Relationships IQ Test [Value: $19]

Communication Styles Checklist [Value: $19]

Designing Winning Mindsets For Entrepreneurs [Value: $49]

SUMMIT PRESENTERS

Summits Praise

16 Leading Experts to Guide You

Tony J Selimi

Tony Jeton Selimi

Life Strategist and Business Consultant Specialising in Human Behaviour, Emotional Intelligence and Maximising Human Potential

Highlights of our conversation

  • Spiritual; mental and emotional breakthroughs.
  • Business; finance. relationships & wealth-building.
  • I help them truly awaken themselves to their biggest potential.
  • Born in northern Macedonia (Yugoslavia, a communist country).
  • All of us experienced abuse, discrimination not being equal to someone else.
  • Healthy family but unhealthy environment.
  • Education and work ethic – learnt how to face challenges.
  • Curiosity about spirituality,science and life’s greatest challenges after life-threatening illness at a young age.
  • I had to be a soldier in the war. My mother sent me to London to save my life.
  • I rather wanted to give my life to save my mother.
  • I was homeless and cried for 6 weeks.
  • Will I ever see my family again?
  • Shame followed me like a ghost.
  • Come to terms with myself.
  • Build your authentic self; grow your soul.
  • The Unbreakable Code.
  • Take back control, own your power, live authentically, live freely on your terms.
  • Self mastery.
  • #loneliness.
  • Point of light & hope
Doug Miller

Doug Miller

Licensed Clinical And Transpersonal Psychologist, Clinical Director Core Emotional Healing

Highlights of our conversation

  • I carried circumcision trauma in my body.
  • The shame we hide.
  • Felt deep betrayal.
  • Feeling unsafe.
  • Our trauma is kept in the vagal nerve until we resolve it.
  • Fear and trauma creates a loss of trust.
  • Conditioning.
  • We are all just people protecting ourselves 
  • Parents divorced when I was 5. It was so abrupt.
  • Hiding in the closet.
  • I needed to be held.
  • Mum married an alcoholic.
  • No one ever sat with my pain.
  • Tough little boy 
  • Anger.
  • Lots of jealousy, fear and trauma.
  • Most of my relationships were on auto, on the hamster wheel.
  • I always felt a bit deprived.
  • Triggering the hell out of each other
  • Anger tells you something is wrong.
  • Blind spots.
  • Men are shamed for feeling beauty
Alan Cox

Alan Cox

Interpersonal Communication

Highlights of our conversation

  • “You will never see me cry again.”
  • Life happens.
  • 40s’ hiccup midlife crisis.
  • 24 hours to talk about a pinch.
  • You can’t solve your problems by distracting yourself. 
  • When you lock your emotions away, you are powerless. 
  • Listening skills.
  • Accept that you are an emotional being.
  • The person that you are with, your partner and children, are emotional beings.
  • How to express your feelings in a way that doesn’t point the finger.
  • Renegotiate expectations. 
  • What being driven causes.
  • People are good defenders not listeners.
  • 7 clues people give when they are about to leave

Jan Robberts

Global Influencer

Highlights of our conversation

  • No coincidences.
  • I was a fat kid. Bullying,calling me names.
  • Outside I was happy, the class clown.
  • Inside I was damaged goods.
  • My parents had no idea. I could hide in my bedroom.
  • By 12 I got tall and bullying stopped, but I kept bullying myself.
  • Ulcer at 16!
  • “I made a decision.”
  • Red Mist
  • Martial arts.
  • Family emigrated.
  • Married at 20 but it only lasted three years.
  • I married someone who wanted to change me.
  • With low self-esteem I decided it was me.
  • Difference between arrogance and confidence.
  • “When there is no enemy within, there is no enemy.”
  • I am now aware of what I put inside my head.
  • My daughter thought it was her fault we split. Daughter bulimia.
  • Second marriage: we drifted apart.
  • Taking relationships for granted.
  • In a relationship with a powerful women, the ego can get in the way

Highlights of our conversation

  • Spiritual; mental and emotional breakthroughs.
  • Business; finance. relationships & wealth-building.
  • I help them truly awaken themselves to their biggest potential.
  • Born in northern Macedonia (Yugoslavia, a communist country).
  • All of us experienced abuse, discrimination not being equal to someone else.
  • Healthy family but unhealthy environment.
  • Education and work ethic – learnt how to face challenges.
  • Curiosity about spirituality,science and life’s greatest challenges after life-threatening illness at a young age.
  • I had to be a soldier in the war. My mother sent me to London to save my life.
  • I rather wanted to give my life to save my mother.
  • I was homeless and cried for 6 weeks.
  • Will I ever see my family again?
  • Shame followed me like a ghost.
  • Come to terms with myself.
  • Build your authentic self; grow your soul.
  • The Unbreakable Code.
  • Take back control, own your power, live authentically, live freely on your terms.
  • Self mastery.
  • #loneliness.
  • Point of light & hope

Highlights of our conversation

  • I carried circumcision trauma in my body.
  • The shame we hide.
  • Felt deep betrayal.
  • Feeling unsafe.
  • Our trauma is kept in the vagal nerve until we resolve it.
  • Fear and trauma creates a loss of trust.
  • Conditioning.
  • We are all just people protecting ourselves 
  • Parents divorced when I was 5. It was so abrupt.
  • Hiding in the closet.
  • I needed to be held.
  • Mum married an alcoholic.
  • No one ever sat with my pain.
  • Tough little boy 
  • Anger.
  • Lots of jealousy, fear and trauma.
  • Most of my relationships were on auto, on the hamster wheel.
  • I always felt a bit deprived.
  • Triggering the hell out of each other
  • Anger tells you something is wrong.
  • Blind spots.
  • Men are shamed for feeling beauty

Highlights of our conversation

  • “You will never see me cry again.”
  • Life happens.
  • 40s’ hiccup midlife crisis.
  • 24 hours to talk about a pinch.
  • You can’t solve your problems by distracting yourself. 
  • When you lock your emotions away, you are powerless. 
  • Listening skills.
  • Accept that you are an emotional being.
  • The person that you are with, your partner and children, are emotional beings.
  • How to express your feelings in a way that doesn’t point the finger.
  • Renegotiate expectations. 
  • What being driven causes.
  • People are good defenders not listeners.
  • 7 clues people give when they are about to leave

Highlights of our conversation

  • No coincidences.
  • I was a fat kid. Bullying,calling me names.
  • Outside I was happy, the class clown.
  • Inside I was damaged goods.
  • My parents had no idea. I could hide in my bedroom.
  • By 12 I got tall and bullying stopped, but I kept bullying myself.
  • Ulcer at 16!
  • “I made a decision.”
  • Red Mist
  • Martial arts.
  • Family emigrated.
  • Married at 20 but it only lasted three years.
  • I married someone who wanted to change me.
  • With low self-esteem I decided it was me.
  • Difference between arrogance and confidence.
  • “When there is no enemy within, there is no enemy.”
  • I am now aware of what I put inside my head.
  • My daughter thought it was her fault we split. Daughter bulimia.
  • Second marriage: we drifted apart.
  • Taking relationships for granted.
  • In a relationship with a powerful women, the ego can get in the way
Justin Black

Justin Black

Redefining Normal

Highlights of our conversation

  • Redefining normal. Is this the normal I want to have?
  • Grew up in foster care system.
  • Unresolved mental health issues in my family over generations lead to substance abuse and domestic violence and poverty.
  • It almost became normal. It gets passed on to the next generation.
  • Mentors and other people spoke life into me and gave me confidence to go to college.
  • Travelling opened my eyes to not feeling limited anymore.
  • The whole experience, good and bad, made me who I am today.
  • What my relationship showed me about myself.
  • I wanted someone to talk to someone like I wanted to talk to my mother.
  • My wife became a therapist. She should not have to do it or be in that position.
  • My satisfaction, my happiness, should come from within, not from other people.
  • Working together
  • Doing whatever you want is the more Macho Man thing, but being intentional, disciplined thoughtful and caring are characteristics of manhood.
Jeff Stitely

Jeff Stitely

Men’s Life and Relationship Coach

Highlights of our conversation

  • What if you are married to someone who cannot be wrong?
  • What if a partner does not want counseling?
  • Committing to breaking through our defences.
  • We were opposites in so many ways.
  • I loved listening to her talk.
  • When she died of cancer it was just me for my kids.
  • I had to balance my parenting.
  • Biggest gift to yourself is to see your partner.
  • My mum did not see me. 
  • Show appreciation.
  • What it means to be present in a relationship. 
  • Authenticity.
  • Conflict resolution.
  • Conflict is so much due to misunderstanding our filters.
  • Be curious, go for clarity.
  • Shut up and listen.
  • Slow down. Sex is not about a goal.
  • Sex is an opportunity to connect.
  • Porn.
  • LGBTQI acceptance/support.
Alain Dumonceaux

Alain Dumonceaux

The Awakened Man – Life Transformation (Men)tor

Highlights of our conversation

  • What does it take for a man to become awakened if he does not even know he is not.
  • Take responsibility for 3 things
  • Living other people’s version of me.
  • Hero’s Journey.
  • I was completely disconnected from my marriage.
  • I was not in it as a couple.
  • Codependent. She lived for me; she lost who she was.
  • I did not put enough in.
  • Once the children came, I felt neglected.
  • Resentment.
  • Father quiet, mother strong-willed, I saw my father as weak.
  • I wouldn’t make a fuss. 
  • I didn’t know how to have a conversation about the stuff that was bothering me.
  • What is truly bothering us?
  • Authenticity.
  • Built connection.
  • Schedule time for each other.
  • No commitment means no trust.
  • What if you are “Married to an asshole?”
Jude Sandvall

Jude Sandvall

The Divorced Dadvocate

Highlights of our conversation

  • There are not enough resources geared at helping men after divorce.
  • Parents separated when I was 15. 
  • Marriage at 29, three daughters. 
  • Divorce is an opportunity to become broken open. 
  • Co-parenting, codependent, caregiver, controlling. 
  • If you don’t get results, you have to alter something.
  • Mother – narcissistic behaviour, dad – distant. 
  • Break generational curse.
  • Love was conditional. 
  • Fathers abdicating responsibilities.
  • One of the mistakes you make as an adult is not to work together.
  • Co-parenting tips.
  • Not to rely on others and not to trust.
Tim Horn

Tim Horn

Board Certified Hypnotist/Instructor

Highlights of our conversation

  • “Your neighborhood mind mechanic”
  • When did your wife know that she could marry you?
  • The way the mind works is important.
  • Don’t shut off a child’s ability to learn.
  • Parents create a context for a feeling within a child.
  • Everything that happens affects you positively or negatively.
  • Pleasing our parents.
  • Abandonment fears.
  • Self-judgement can make you jail yourself.
  • Create a new normal.
  • Self-abandonment.
  • People audition to be in a relationship with you.
  • Natural resilience.
  • When you work things out you, are able to let it go.
  • How much do you value the other person?
  • Accept our own and the other person’s frailties.
  • Fear of being wrong.
John A Hardy

John A Hardy

Director / Founder

Highlights of our conversation

  • Making your own way in the world, I grew up in a very angry home.
  • No one ever won, I took it into my marriage.
  • Men have to realise what they are doing wrong.
  • Blockages.
  • Men are proud. 
  • Listen and adjust.
  • Men struggle to live up to examples in the media such as strong, capable, etc.
  • Have to own up to our challenges.
  • The willingness to admit we have weaknesses, the opportunity to be really strong.
  • Let go of pride, arrogance and fix-it mentality
  • Be teachable
  • “I don’t have all the answers” 
  • Men are good at hard skills but learning soft skills is transformational 
  • Asking for help!
Chuck Groot

Chuck Groot

Chuck Groot Financial and Business consulting

Highlights of our conversation

  • Married to an alcoholic.
  • Dissociate disease from a person.
  • We model ourselves on our fathers 
  • Drop stereotypes. Mother and charge of house, father in business.
  • The values a man needs for a successful relationship and a successful life 
  • We need to be in control of our own mind and beliefs.
  • Examine your own roles.
  • Two people going the same direction, at the same time.
  • Willingness to have meaningful conversations. 
  • How many people actually respect themselves?
  • Everyone wants to be liked and to be loved.
  • Know that you are a worthy individual; worthy of love; equal to what you are willing to give.
Mahesh Grossman

Mahesh Grossman

Somatic Hypnotherapist

Highlights of our conversation

  • Sharing great visualization techniques.
  • We carry our Internalized Parents inside us
  • My father tried to kill me when I was 30 days old
  • My mother believed that ‘fathers leave because of a child’.
  • I was molested by my grandfather and father.
  • How not to be pissed off in your relationship. 
  • Feel in your body something you have not released.
  • Internalized patterns.
  • Unconditional love.
  • Refill yourself with joy and inner peace.
  • We suppress our best natural qualities.
  • We believe it is not safe.
  • Anger .
  • Withdraw.
  • Control as a way of self protection.
James Stephenson

James Stephenson

Author and Coach

Highlights of our conversation

  • Single mum and absent dad.
  • One questions your worth.
  • I have not figured out how to love me. 
  • “Man up”
  • Crushing your emotions sets you up for deeper failure, deeper hurt. You are less capable of being a successful man and capable man and husband and father.
  • It’s okay to cry.
  • When you do not have an example of how to be a good father.
  • Children absorb so much in the first years.
  • I didn’t even know how much I questioned my own capabilities.
  • Abandonment Fears
  • When you have to prove something by your job title, your salary. Conditional worth.
  • It’s like you are having all these feelings that you’re not good enough unless you can get there. 
  • Am I avoiding all the futures that I fear as opposed to living in the now 
  • How much of your mother’s burden have you taken on yourself?
  • Write it down; don’t just think it. It’s therapeutic when pen hits paper.
Larry McInnes

Larry McInnes

Happiness and Abundance Coach

Highlights of our conversation

  • After 20 years of marriage I cheated on my wife. I lost everything.
  • I spent many nights on my friend’s sofa – with a cat.
  • I fell into a deep depression.
  • My kids disowned me.
  • I started running from that damn sofa towards the unknown.
  • What was missing in my life?
  • A general or overall level of unhappiness… but you get used to stuff like that.
  • Was this really where I wanted to be?
  • I didn’t think it was fixable.
  • I just wanted out.
  • I did not see any affair on the horizon.
  • This is what affairs do: you are living two lives and comparing two lives.
  • The affair was starting to have its difficulties too.
  • I was not happy in either place.
  • I had a responsibility to address the issues.
  • I can’t fix past but I can address the present
  • We don’t talk about what bothers us.
  • I didn’t know what I didn’t know.
Yonason Goldson

Yonason Goldson

Director of Ethical Imperatives, LLC

Highlights of our conversation

  • Men are designed incomplete.
  • We are two individuals.
  • It is easier to learn than to unlearn.
  • My father was an intellectual. Rigid, very stereotypical. 
  • He reacted sharply. It’s a problem for me too.
  • Decision fatigue.
  • Integrity means you are home.
  • Living a contradiction.
  • Living according to standards.
  • Empathy. Trustworthiness. Humility. Inquisitiveness. Courage. Self-discipline.
  • Surround yourself with people who challenge you.
  • Real strength is an internal quality, not external
  • Men will compensate by putting on a show.
  • 12-step model.
  • Something greater than yourself.
  • Happiness comes from purpose.
  • Religion can be a cult.
  • When to be more assertive, when to be passive .
  • I had to start at the beginning. I was not even sure I believed in God.
  • The Pursuit of Happiness.
Louise VN Liebenberg

Louise VN Liebenberg

The Female Perspective

Highlights of our conversation

  • As an Unresolved Trauma Expert, Relationship Counselor and Confidence Coach, Louise shares her own life transformation through not only a traumatic childhood, but also a traumatic marriage.
  • From her perspective on where she is now, and through her experience as Group Coaching Facilitator, she shares her experience by being part of these open conversations, but also by highlighting the similarities and differences between men and women
  • She wants you to know that you can change everything that is holding you back.  

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