Learn to respond, not react

​5 steps to becoming a more effective communicator: Reactivity in ourselves and other causes wars. The all out anger ones. The endless bickering about everything kind. The vengeful, I-will-get-you-back-how-dare-you kind. The three week silent treatment standoffs. The let's-pretend-it-never-happened ones. The passive aggressive, "I do not even realize I am actually angry under my seemingly friendly facade" wars Reactivity is a hard…

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Real Communication

When it comes to the human race and human nature, there is one thing that is true for everyone. EVERYONE. Even those of us who have not tuned into ourselves for so long, that we have forgotten it. And this is it, the leveling-the-playing-field thing: We all want to be heard. That is what let us give up on our parents (caregivers/spouses/friends), way back, originally. We did not feel heard. Or seen. Or accepted. Or loved. or supported. Or worthwhile.

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Do you love me enough to love my “NO”?

I find it hard to choose between the books that had such a profound influence on my life, but "Boundaries" by Dr John Townsend and Dr Henry Cloud is definitely top 5! I call it my Boundaries Bible with good reason. Say we actually have good, healthy boundaries - which many of us do not have - what happens if…

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